Doesn’t that put a new twist on the lyrics? What they all seem to agree on, however, is that black widow venom is not really as harmful as you’d think to humans – you’ll get a bit sick but you won’t die – and is only really deadly to children, the elderly and the infirm. She could, however, have included “local swelling spasmodic pain nausea and profuse perspiration,” all of which are symptoms of a black widow bite – but that might have put the song in danger of having anything to do with actual black widows.ĮDIT: Apparently “breathing problems” are in fact a noted symptom of black widow bites, although only a few of the sources I checked seem to mention it. Tie you up? Something else a spider might do with its victim? There’s a thing in that verse about you “gasping for air,” which would be kinda clever if asphyxiation was a symptom of black widow venom, but it isn’t. Well, Azalea isn’t exactly specific about what she’s going to do, actually. Why, you’ll even praise Jesus Himself for all the… all those thing’s she’s gonna… “I’m gonna love you till it hurts / Just to get you, I’m doing whatever works.” Apparently you’re gonna really enjoy it, too, because if you didn’t know by now, flies only writhe and struggle about in those webs out of anticipation – they’re just having a great time waiting to die. Then the second verse arrives and the song dramatically shifts from one about a failing relationship to another about some weird dominatrix fantasy. So how do killer spiders figure into all this? The lyrics: A relationship has gone seriously sour, with both parties – once madly in love with each other – now finding themselves unable to stand each other anymore: “it’s like I loved you so much and now I just hate you / Feeling stupid for all the time that I gave you.” She doesn’t really have much to say about it except for “my word, how you suck,” but this sort of thing is still fertile ground for a pop song, provided you can take an original look at it.
You know, those rising inflections, that weird accent, all those, er, rhymes… look, I don’t know much about hip hop, all right? Meet me halfway here. What else? Should I comment on Azalea’s flow here? Okay, well, if you like Azalea’s flow you should like what she does here, because it’s the same attitude-inflected rap style she used on “Fancy”.
That’s about it for the music, to be honest: mostly that lifeless beat bubbling under a simple verse-chorus-verse structure, simmering on until it ends without ceremony. The bridge is decent – I quite like that – but overall the whole thing is just a bit flat and dull. Unfortunately it feels like it’s building to something much better that it can’t deliver on – which, as it turns out, it doesn’t, because instead of rising and exploding it just drops back to that beat. The chorus doesn’t really do much and isn’t particularly memorable to my ears, but I could see why someone would like it: Ora’s a good singer and she handles what semblance of a melody is here well enough. Am I supposed to sit and wait for this black widow to come and attack me? Am I a fly now? Is that what the music industry thinks of me? Charming. What am I supposed to do with this music? I can’t dance to it – there’s not enough groove or swing for that. It’s just not very interesting or catchy for a pop single. The music: Oh, I suppose there is music here, isn’t there? Well, the minimalist beat is obviously trying to convey a creepy, sinister vibe, because that’s what people associate with venomous spiders but the creepiness wears off pretty quickly because the beat is so repetitive. Given the buzz this song’s been getting I expected more, honestly. Note: skip ahead to about 1:42 for the actual song.įirst impressions: Wait, was that it? Er, all right then. Quite the stretch, that, wasn’t it? I’m very sorry. Speaking of “fancy”, today it’s “Black Widow” by Iggy Azalea featuring Rita Ora. Fancy another pop song review? Sure you do.
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